5 Reasons to be Optimistic

Just saw an interesting poll on ESPN where 30% of people WANTED to see the Angels win the world series (Yankees 27%, Dogs 25%, and Phillies 18%). I, for one, didn't realize anyone likes the Angels. Maybe this is the result of a bitter Red Sox nation, or maybe people want to see them do it for Adenhart. Either way, I was caught off guard a little by that stat. 

Also, 57% of Californians are more interested in the Yankees/Angels series than the Dogs/Phils...hmmmmm

As for the our upcoming Showdown, here are a 5 things that make me confident we can win this:

1) We only have to beat EITHER Hamels or Lee once. If we can sweep the back of their rotation-- a totally feasible scenario--we'd only have to win one other game. I'm assuming that both Lee and Hamels will pitch two games in the series.

2) We're not gonna get bullied around this year. Last year when things got chippy the Dogs stuck their tails between their legs. This year we have much more pitching depth, the toughest catcher in the majors, crazy Padilla, and a swagger we didn't have last year. 

3) James Loney and Jim Thome. Loney absolutely owned the Phils this year, hitting .393 with 2 bombs, 11 hits, and 17 total bases in 7 games. Add a potent JL to a lineup that is already gelling, and I smell upset. Also, I'm still convinced Thome's going to come up big at some point in the playoffs. 

4) George Sherrill and Hong Chih-Kuo. The best set up-man and situational left-hander in the majors. Kuo's career numbers against the Phillies: 8.1 IP, 0 ER, 10 Ks, 3 BB. 

5) Wolf/Kershaw in games one and two. The Phillies have scored half as many runs- and batted 30 points lower- against lefties. The crowd is gonna be amped up, Hamels just had a baby, and Cliff Lee is a nerd. If we can beat one of their two big guns in LA we're going to be in great shape. If we beat both, the series is over. 

5b) You know Bud Selig wants a Dodgers vs. Yankees World Series. Maybe we get a few calls?

5c) Hiroki Kuroda is back in the mix. Dude is typically lights out against the Phillies. Career stats: 3 G, 19 innings, 17 Ks, 5BB, 0.95 ERA

5d) Vin Scully

5f) Lidge vs Manny in the ninth. Lidge poops his pants, and Manny hits a bomb. 

Bums vs. Phils: Tale of The Tape

Ok my wondrous bunch of Dodger enthusiasts, let's embark on our journey toward the Bronx to face the mighty (over-paid and flaccid) Yankees.

Next Stop: PHILLY!

Let's break this one down, position-by-position, including several intangibles, and see who has the advantage in this series (or at least as I see it).

CATCHER: Russ J. C. R. T. Q. Martin vs. Carlos Ruiz.

Winner: MARTIN – This one is a no-brainer. While Ruiz is an excellent catcher with an above-average arm and the ability to get on base, Russ is simply the best game-manager in MLB. Even the great Greg Maddux declared his unflinching love for the kid. Russ has taken a young, sporadic, inexperienced staff (Wolf has one career playoff start), and led them to the lowest team-ERA in the league. Russ is incredible defensively, a leader in the clubhouse, and is still REALLLLLYYYYYY due for massive hit.

1B: James Loney vs. Ryan Howard

Winner: HOWARD – Loney is a gold-glover with a nice consistent bat but this one was easy as well. Howard is a premier game-changer, with unmatched power. Howard is always a threat and has the strength to hit the ball out of the park in any direction.

2B: O-Dog/Ronnie vs. Utley

Winner: UTLEY – As much as I despise this guido, slick-rick d-bag, utley is perhaps the league's best 2Bman. The dude can straight rake and has a dependable glove as well. As for Dodgers, our all-star 2Bman, the O-dog, is now benched, so, yeah, this one goes to Philly as well.

3B: Lumberjack vs. Feliz

Winner: CASEY AT BAT – The Lumberjack gets the nod here by a long-shot. Casey is the silent assassin, the bums’ clubhouse leader, and a calm presence on the field and at the plate. His smooth walk in Game 2 of the NLDS kept the game-winning rally alive and his glove work on the field has been rock-solid. Feliz is an ex-giant with a vulva the size of an apple. The Beard takes the cake here easily.

SS: Raffy vs. Rollins

Winner: RAFFY – I know what you’re thinking…. Wow! No Way! Well, YES WAY!! I take Raffy here simply based on current form. While Jimmy was the MLB MVP just a few seasons ago, his ability to get on base has regressed quicker than the popularity of Creed. Meanwhile, Raffy is playing out of his mind, literally getting on base 2-3 times/game. He has been the catalyst for this team since September 1 and matched with his arm, his switch-hitting ability, his potbelly, the fact that he is my favorite player, and Rollins’ season-long slump, I give the slight edge to the Dodgers here (am I just bitter that I had Rollins in fantasy baseball and he stunk, maybe, but I digress)

RF: Andre the TacoMan vs. JaYson Werth

Winner: WERTH – This is the tightest race and the closest matchup (and perhaps the most critical matchup) in the series. Both players had breakout seasons, with JaYson (what’s with the Y werth) making an all-star appearance. Both players bat early in the lineup and have had some very clutch hits throughout the season. Both have been hot recently as well. I gave Werth the nod because he is a much bigger threat on the basepath, with 20+ SBs this season, and has a slight edge in the field (great range and a devastating arm to gun out baserunners). While Werth has the edge here, i believe that the outcome of the series might hinge on whichever of these two young-guns makes more big plays (both at the plate and in the field)

CF: The Bison vs. Victorino

Winner: KEMP – this one was easy. Victorino is a solid ballplayer and the type of guy that all great teams need and have, but when push comes to shove, nobody has more raw talent in this league than matt kemp. I mean that. He needs to channel it, but the kid is basically still a basketball player and is already turning heads in this baseball league. He is Griffey-esque in CF with speed and power at the plate. Now he needs to hang with Manny and watch some film and get out of his 98-strikeout-in-a-row slump and show up and batter the phils in the NLCS.

LF: Manny Being Manny vs. Raul (I took just as much roids as Manny) Ibanez

Winner: MANNY – Really? I need to explain this one? A very nice season for Raul (although he stunk 2nd-half, like Manny) but this is a joke of a matchup. Manny is heating up and look for the big guy to play a key role for the Bums in this NLCS.

BENCH: Dodgers or Philles

Winner: DODGERS – The Bums are sporting what might be the most complete bench in playoff history. Hall-of-fame slugger Thome is always a threat and rocked the ill ski googles during the champagne celebration, Juan-For-Four has been excellent and is our speed man, Loretta is the NLDS magic-maker, Ausmus is the veteran presence, the O-dog is a an all-star and gold glover for defense, and Castro is serviceable and talks to Manny. As for the Phils, Bako? Stairs (ugh the HR last yr)? Francisco? Cairo? Bruntlett? Ok, you get the point… Bums all the way here.

BULLPEN (non-closers): Bums vs. Phillies

Winner: DODGERS, easy. MLB’s-best ERA matched with an epic performance in round 1 vs the Cardinals. Between my father’s crush Belisario, Kuo, Troncoso, Mota (celebration MVP), and Sherrill the Postman, there might not be a deeper set-up arsenal in the league. Match that with Garland, DREAM WEAVER (came up HUGE vs the redbirds), perhaps Kuroda/Bills as long-men if we need them, this category is all bums by a longshot. Phils have some nice arms in Park (remember him!), Eyre, Madsen, Romero, Myers, and Happ, but the Bums are in a different class here.

CLOSER: Brox the Ox vs. Brad (Pujols Dinger still flyin’) Lidge

Winner: BROXTON – not even close again. Yes, Lidge was absolutely lights out… LAST YEAR! Yes, Lidge did not blow a single save… LAST YEAR! This year, Lidge has been an absolute nightmare. He led the league in blown-saves, lost his job on several occasions, had very few games where he threw a clean inning, and basically had his confidence shattered time and time again. Meanwhile, Brox has been the ox that we say he is. If the only question mark here was inexperience, then Brox answered those calls with his massive outings against Fat Albert and Co. in the NLDS.

STARTING ROTATION: Wolfman / Kershawshank Redemption / Vincente the Axeman / Bills(?) vs. Lee / Hamels / Pedro / Blanton

Winner: PHILLIES – I waffled on this one for a bit, but I will explain myself. To begin, I love the Bums’ staff right now. The Phils are a lefty-loaded team and the dodgers will throw 2 lefties in wolf and kersh at them right out of the gate. I believe in wolf, especially after watching his postgame interview in STL, and I anticipate a solid start out of him. We all know that I have a massive man-crush on Kershaw and I still truly believe his left arm is the answer to world peace. This kid is electric and his facial hair is unexplainably patchy. Padilla was the Bums’ NLDS MVP, with a career-best outing, deservingly earning an NLCS start. I also believe Bills, if called upon, will step up to the rubber and dish (even though the Phils battered him last year). Another person to keep an eye on is Kuroda, whose sushi-therapy is going well and might return for the NLCS. But, all that said, I still give the nod to the Phils for two reasons: 1) experience, Hamels was the playoff mvp last year and we all know what pedro of the past has done in the playoffs. More recently, Lee has been untouchable. 2) history, just last season in the NLCS, the bums couldn’t even see the ball vs. hamels, and Blanton pitched very nicely against us as well. I think we have the arms and talent to keep up with the phils, and the bats to smack em around. Blanton kind of stinks, pedro is aging, hamels has not been himself, and lee must be tiring a bit after his long outings vs the rockies, but until the game is played, I give the slight edge to the phils

MANAGER: Torre vs. Manuel

Winner: TORRE – Ha. I watch A LOT of baseball… a lot of sports for that matter, and I have NEVER, I repeat NEVER (short of Coach James Bond in my Pee Wee A State Championship hockey game, leaving Reid and I out on the ice for the last 6 minutes of the game in our heroic victory) seen a Coaching Clinic quite like the one Torre put on in the NLDS. And remember, his opponent was hall-of-famer Tony (Mr. DUI) La Russa. Torre had all the right hunches, made all the right calls, and simply led the Bums straight through a scary bunch of cardinals. An epic display of baseball wisdom by Ole Torre. Philly’s Manuel is a wonderful manager and a winner as well, more recently than Joe, but who would you rather have than Torre guiding your team in October? Exactly.

HOMEFIELD: Chavez Ravine vs. Stinkadelphia

Winner: LOS ANGELES – Last year, the Dodgers went down a few games in Philly and this series was all but over. However, hard work and 95 wins puts the Bums at home with Grandpa Vin this year to start the series, and this is a notable and obvious advantage for the Dodgers.

INTANGIBLES: Dodgers vs. Phillies

Winner: DODGERS – Now this is a category that I would be remiss to pass over. Let’s think about what’s going on right now with the Bums, shall we, and breakdown why the Dodgers simply have the MOJO WORKIN: 1) Grandpa Vin announces this year that he is retiring after one more season (DO IT FOR VIN!); 2) even though the Bums won an NL-leading 95 games, we are underdogs repeatedly, and everyone loves to play as an underdog; 3) things that just don’t happen to dodgers are happening, like Ethier leading the league in walk-off hits, Loretta stepping up to ice the game after Holliday took it in the junk, Torre making correct, game-changing decisions (instead of Tracy’s and Grady Little’s awful shenanigans as dodger skippers), and players not blowing up and striking out after bad calls, but fighting through at-bats to get on base; 4) FUN! We are simply having fun! Did you see the videos of the celebration? These dudes LOVE one another, they love being Dodgers, and they play for the fans. They know that there is a lot of work to be done, trust me, torre and Lasorda will not let them forget that, but these dodgers have the “IT-FACTOR” that winning teams display; 5) Larry Bowa. C’mon, the most intense dude on the planet. As my little bro calls it, “FIRE IN THE EYES!” If he has to, I feel like Bowa would take an extra-inning at-bat, this guy is hungry, and so are the Dodgers. MOJO to the Bums!

So let’s tally up:

DODGERS: 11

Phillies: 4

Looks like the Tale of The Tape has spoken. Dodgers it is.

LET’S DO THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bums in 6.

Holy Bandito!

[Editor's Note: Sean is maybe the biggest Dodgers fan I know. His dogs are all named Johnny Podres and his dad really wanted to name his sister Delino. He has a lot to offer Dodger nation. So here he is. Hope you enjoy.]

An insightful posting often commences with a flavorful quote by a world leader, a famed author, or a grungy rockstar.

Well, folks, I provide you with this, a pungent line uttered by none other than the sagacious Jose Lima: “LimaTime is halfway between a parakeet lost in a marijuana field and Margaritaville.” (Lima actually said this about himself, what a stud)

Now, I presume you’re asking yourself, why the hell are we talking about Lima Time? Well, the last time the Bums faced the Cardinals in the NLDS, it was 2004, and Jose Lima displayed his manly, genital-herpes driven talents by offering a memorable CG Shutout for the Bums victory. Sam and I sat in his beer-stained living room and emotionally connected with Jose as he forever changed our lives.

The connection between Lima Time and the 2009 Dodgers is striking. In 2004, it was Jose’s kookiness, wackiness, herpes, and emotion that fueled his success. Well, folks, this Dodgers team, to me, has a similar vibe.

Last night, I told Sam that I truly believed that we were going to beat the Cards. Not just my biased subjective feelings, but my honest gut feelings, those that originate deep in my inner cockles. I know the Bums have struggled of late, but I love our blend of veteranship, goofiness, innocence, and grit. This club exudes all that is Lima Time. And Kim Ng has two letters (no vowels) in her last name.

Between Joseph Torre, Bradley Ausmus, Juanathan Castro, and James Thome, our managerial staff is loaded, and Jason Repko is always available to run full speed into a wall (please note, Repko will not be on the active playoff roster).

Meanwhile, Raffy and Manny channel the energy of Fernando-Mania while Larry Bowa is a clear descendant of Lima Time. These two fine gentlemen, in my opinion, will serve as the X-factors (cliché, ugh) in the 2009 NLDS. The Cards produce a ton of ground-balls, thus creating a plethora of double-play oppurtunities. Further, Yadier Molina has the strongest cannon in the league (I’ve always wanted somebody to describe me as having the strongest cannon in something) and can snipe base-stealers with the best of ‘em. That being said, Raffy needs to get on base early and often and run the bases intelligently. Manny needs to elevate the ball and move runners over and in. I wouldn’t be surprised to see a number of Juan-For-Four Pierre cameos in this series, as his speed will be Wanted in this series like a bad bad man in the wild wild west.

Further, the lumberjack, Casey Blake, is our silent assassin, a man who I see chopping the legs out from under the Cards, perhaps with a late-inning bloop single in Game 2. While we are on the subject, how much would you be willing to bet that Casey Blake is direct relative of Robert E. Lee. I have a funny feeling about this, just take my word.

Our infield duo of Ronnie and the O-Dog is as solid as they come. I am uncertain as to who will start, although I’d give the nod to Orlando. Defense is of the foremost importance in the playoffs, and the O-Dog’s glove is bright gold. Ronnie can provide a nice spark off the bench, and a slice of pepperoni pizza.

Russell J. Coltrane Martin. It’s Go Time, buddy. Get your F*&^ing head out of you’re A$$ and play some bleepin’ baseball. Enough is enough. Be the leader you yearn to be. If you do, I promise Paris Hilton will sleep with you.

Matt Kemp, the future centerfielder for the NY Yankees when Steinbrenner throws a $200-million dollar contract at his face, is going to have Carlos Beltran-esque breakout in these playoffs. The man is primed for an explosion and his raw talent is unmatched in Major League Baseball. I love this man. I really do. I have even forgiven him for not giving me a baseball 2 summers ago during BP at a Bums/Rockies game in Denver. I forgive you Matt. I am sorry. Now please go hit 8 home runs. Thank you.

Andre, oh Andre. You are the spark that makes the roller-coaster in my heart run. You are the conductor of the Dodger magic. You hold the keys buster, now embrace that role. How do you have like 39 walk-off hits and then hit like .073 to end the season? Are you blogging about tacos too much and not watching film? Which Andre is going to show up for the NLDS? Look Andre, I know you were traded for Milton Bradley, thus creating massive shoes for you to fill, but move past this, man. You are an individual Andre, and a strikingly handsome one at that. Believe in your talent Andre, I know I do. Because if you continue to stink, Juan-For-Four will gladly hit triples in your honor.

As for the pitching…DREAMMMMM WEAVERRRRRRRRR! My dearest Dodgers buddies know that I have a soft spot in my rapidly-beating heart for Jeffrey. But this postseason belongs to a younger lad. I man whose attempt at a beard rivals Sam Brand circa 7th grade. A man whose left arm might eventually have a direct correlation to the solution for peace in Israel. Yes, I am talking about Matt Stafford’s best friend, Clayton Kershaw. Clayton, your performance on Saturday, in a must-win situation, brought tears to my eyes (and prompted my to buy a bottle of champagne at a dive bar to celebrate; it might have been the first bottle of champagne ever ordered at that place). Your stuff is nearing unhittable Mr. Kershaw, now go out there and deal. The Wolfman’s Brother, C-Bills, Garlandio, and Vincente Olmedo Padilla are there to support you pal (by throwing at Fat Albert’s head), so don’t hold back. Destiny awaits.

Between Broxilicious, Georgie the Mailman, Old McDonald Had a Farm, Jet Li Kuo, Ramon Martinez Troncoso, Baracuda Belisario, and Dreammmmm Weaverrrrrr, our bullpen is quite saucy, and not a huge concern of mine. If need be, Mark Loretta can always pitch a frame.

So there you have it Banditos of the Bums…Rally the troops. Break out the lucky jockstraps. Grow the moustaches. Feed the lucky cactus. It’s time to BOOGIE.

IT’S LIMA TIME!!!

Dodgers in 4.

NOT SURE IF YOU NOTICED

we made the playoffs. two years in a row. joe torre doesnt lose. really, he refuses. im not positive he sticks his fingers in personnel decisions at the minor minor league level, but hes there. looking over, dominating your overview with a mentality of success.

and thats in large part how we did it again. because we're from la, and we play against sd, and sf and the widespread beautiful sunflower seed state of kansas/colorado. we have no excuse. and torre was brought to us to manifest that destiny of statistical success.

we did it this year. we finished with the top team batting avg in the NL (.270). We finished with the top ERA of all major league teams (3.41). btw, wow. thats kinda a big deal. i feel like we've been on the verge of that for years, yet some other NL West teams sneaks in and takes the title.

The Dodgers kinda fucked shit up statistically after 162 games. Kemp only got 101 RBI, but Im having a hard time remembering when we had two players who kicked so much ass.

and we're not talking about the mound. or the legend who's just now picking up his game. i saw manny enthusiastically wave in a runner from third, eyebrows raised, eyes wide, hey i dont have any faith in myself. manny was lost, average, just somebody else in uniform, on the orioles, or who knows, an overpaid legend waiting for the guy on third to touch home on a passed ball. i saw it. game 160. unlike him. as were the 4 Ks he had that game. But word is he's hitting line drives to right field (bill simmons twitter says thats the first step towards busting out) . Sean says we gotta believe. So i'm gonna do that.

Wednesday night. welcome back to the playoffs.

I have a couple enduring memories of the playoffs. One of them involves Jose Lima, herpes (not mine), the Cardinals, and skipping class, watching the game and getting my CompLit grade reduced by a third for not showing up. I guess it was worth it. I'm making millions now. OK, not true. But who cares. lets just get into the second round and then talk about whatever's beyond.

C'mon Bros

With all this jibber jabber about our inconsistent and unreliable rotation, the media is failing to address the real concern for the Dodgers if we hope to make a playoff run: our hitting. Sure on paper we look like an offensive juggernaut--highest batting avg. in the majors, most runs in the National Leage-- but Ethier has just one hit in his last 27 at bats, Manny is hitting like boy-band Manny, and the Dogs have averaged around 3 runs facing Washington, Pittsburgh and San Diego scrubs. 

Let's face it, come playoff time the season statistics and records really don't matter. It comes down to who's the hottest team. Last year the Phillies entered the playoffs after an 11-3 stretch. In 2007, the Rockies cruised to the World Series riding their 20 something game regular season winning streak. It's because of this that  we see Wild Card teams go on a "miraculous" runs to the world series (Tampa Bay Rays, Rockies, Florida Marlins, 2004 Red Sox). These teams are generally fighting to get into the playoffs up to the last game of the season and are on top of their game when they finally get there. 

Furthermore and henceforth, in order for the Dodgers to make a run deep into October we really need Ethier, Manny and crew to pick up their game BEFORE we get to the playoffs. Torre should not rest these guys. Get our starters--specifically Ethier, Manny and Russ--as many at-bats as possible. Our pitching staff, Billingsly included, has been kicking ass as of late and I would bet my bottom dollar they'll be excellent in the playoffs. Our offense will be the difference between a first round ousting or a run to the series. 

Jason, Jason, Jason

Hello friends, it's been a while.

I just came across this article by Jason Stark. To summarize it briefly, Stark ranks potential postseason rotations from best to worst, one through nine. Ahead of the Dodgers are: the Red Sox, Cardinals, Phillies, Yankees, Angels, Tigers and Rockies. I understand putting the Sox, Cards, and even the and Yankees ahead of us, but this is downright ignaaaant.

The Dogs have had the best ERA in the bigs virtually all year, and their starters have the best combined ERA of any of these nine teams. Homie should stop worrying about the order, and start considering the rotation as a whole. Personally, I would feel more comfortable pitching Billingsly (who Stark doesn't even have etched in the rotation) in a must win over Joel Pinero, Scott Kazmir, Rick Porcello, Joe Blanton and Jason Marquis--all players who Stark has at the 3 for teams ranked above the Dodgers. Give me any of our 5--I'm assuming Garland will be in the pen despite his playoff experience-- over Nate Robertson, Pedro, Ervin Santana, Chad Gaudin, or Kyle Lohse.

Our rotation's potentially scary, and even if Bills and Kershaw don't regain their first-half form, we have very good starters waiting in the pen. Garland has a 1.91 ERA since joining the Dogs, and a 2.25 career playoff ERA, Padilla hasn't lost as a dodger, has gone 5+ innings in every start and knows the Phillies after playing for them from 2001-2005, and Billingsly is an all-star innings eater who, when on his game, is a top 10 pitcher in the bigs. Pretty solid "fall backs" if you ask me.

Personally, I think we'll wind up with a four man rotation of Wolf, Kershaw, Kuroda, and Bills. Having all these arms will only help. When the Phils throw Cliff Lee at us on 3-days rest we'll counter with a fully rested Wolf or Kershaw. The more quality arms the better as far as I'm concerned.

Look for Bills to bring his A-game tonight at San Diego. If his A-game isn't good enough for the W, then maybe he's not ready for the playoff rotation.

Observations - August 20 (Cubs Must Die)

Game 122 on WGN. The first game I've caught in full since Verizon accidentally killed my Wi-Fi when I switched up my plan a couple weeks ago. 3.5 games up in the division at the start of the game. We need a win.

- Tonight's intriguing duos: WGN announcers Bob Brenley and Len Kasper (who will be referred to in this post as Jeff Twardzik, for no real reason); Andre Ethier and Milton Bradley, Weaver vs. Gorzelanny

- Two warning track outs in the top of the first - somehow a 1,2,3 inning. Weaver is gonna make this an interesting one.

- Rafael Furcal - 6 stolen bases this year. If I remember correctly, Kenny Loften had 6 a game when he hit 40.

- Fukudome bibim bomb (I know, he's Japanese, not Korean. It sounds good, deal with it). Top of second. The Weaver feast begins?

- Old timer Cubs coach in the stands. Came up with the dodgers 40 years ago. Summer of '69. The players would listen to Vin Scully on the radio while in the dugout. The red headed godfather is a national treasure.

- 6oth year for Lasorda. 60th year for Scully. Brenley: The difference between the two: "Vin comes up with new stories every once in a while."

- Lasorda's only milestone as a player according to Baseball Reference? His 7 wild pitches in 1956 gave him the third most in the AL.

- Charlie Haeger and Jeff Weaver are in our starting rotation with 40 games to go in the season. That's like 8 starts each. Shit?

- Things never before noticed until now about Dodger Stadium and the Dodgers: big, white moonbounce out beyond center; "Think Cure!" painted along the third base line; Russell Martin's jersey says "J. Martin."

- Brenley says one team in the NL has used its bullpen more than us. The Nationals.

- Player we miraculously don't have on the books: Alfonso Soriano.

- Weaver gets out of a bases loaded one-out jam in the 3rd with the luckiest back-to-back strikeouts i've ever seen. Low and away sliders to drunk Soriano followed by fingers-crossed juiceballs down the middle to Baker.

- Twardzik: Joe Torre has led his team to the playoffs in each of the last 13 years. If the Dodgers make it this year, he'll tie Bobby Cox for the record.

- Kings of Leon drummer in the stands. Probably thought BROnson Arroyo was on the mound tonight.

- Key Moment: 2-2, bottom 6, bases loaded, 1 out. Russell Martin at the plate vs. Angel Guzman after the intentional walk to Loney. I would've taken the deep sac fly. I'll take the grand slam, Russ' 4th(!) homer of the year.

- Aramis Ramirez. batting .324. Has 34 RBI. There's probably a logical explanation. Probably involves Alfonso Soriano.

- Troncoso is a member of the underrated beard club. Confederate general category.

- Twardzik: Manny swung at/made contact with every first pitch he's seen tonight.

- Shitty stat club tally:
Soriano: OBP = .300
Aramis Ramirez: RBI = 34
Rafael Furcal: SB = 4
Russell Martin: HR = 4

Great win. Dodgers at 72-50, maintain 3.5 game lead on the Rockies, 5.5 on the Giants.

Observations - July 23

- After watching last night's game, it's become apparent that Matt Kemp is not only one of the most underrated hitters in the majors, as everyone seems to be saying right now, but he's also one of the most deft and range-y centerfielders in the MLB.

- I learn time and again that Russell Martin is a superb catcher. Last night he knocked numerous awry Billingsley pitches into the dirt in front of him, and he executed 2 impressive throwouts during the game: one to end the inning and save a run after scooping up a Billingsley wild pitch and rocketing it to first; another to third to catch votto/nicks/other white Reds guy stealing (stupidly) with zero outs.

- Billingsley is wild. The walk totals don't lie.

- Manny Ramirez is the greatest hitter I've ever watched play on my computer screen. Vin Scully said during the broadcast, "the crowd made the loudest noise in 20 years" after Manny's pinch-hit grand slam.

- Bronson Arroyo's hair needs to be cut for cancer or some other worthy cause.

- Vin says Tim Wakefield is the best guitarist in the MLB. Yes, better than Bronson.

- David Weathers.

- Don Sutton pitched on the 1988 championship team. I noticed this the other day while looking up Mike Sharperson's stats. Sutton didn't make the cut for the postseason roster and retired the following offseason.

- The Dogs swept the Reds. They're now 78-23. Or something like that.

HAWT Dodgers Gear for '09

I don't own enough Dodgers gear. Every Dodgers fan is required to own a New Era fitted cap, and I'm cool in that department. I've got a freebie Dodgers.com white tee that's too soot-smeared to wear out in public. And I've got a blue Garciaparra tee, inherited from the big little bro, but it's a few boobs too big for me. I need some new gear, but I won't wear just anything. I probably won't even wear a replica jersey. Like hockey and football jerz's, authentic baseball tops just don't work unless you're a rapper, a lesbian, or wearing baseball stirrups. So forget the dozens of potentially awesome replica jerseys (Choi, Strawberry, Butler, Quantrill, etc.) you can spend your day hunting down on eBay. All I want for Christmas is Chin-lung Hu.

Dodgers Tie Dye Shirt - $20.00

Can't figure out if this is ironic wear or serious wear. Probably depends what you accessorize it with.

Dodgers Poncho - $65

Fashion Tip: Be naked under this.

1988 World Champions Ring - $8.99

This will look good on you in Facebook photos and when you grab things off the rack at upscale secondhand boutiques.

Reversible Leather/Wool Jacket - $179.99

OK, don't get this.

Reebok Dodgers Sandals - $24.95

For optimal function, slip these on in the morning, smoke a bowl out of Bong Chi Kuo, sit in recliner, watch Three's Company.

Fernando Valenzuela Cooperstown Throwback Jersey - $105

I know I said no jerseys. This is the one and only exception. ABBA wrote a song about him.

Phiten Titanium Dodgers Necklace X30 - $23.99

I don't know what this is, but you can probably use it as a whip in case the Pablo Sandoval fan next to you gets a little unruly.

Los Doyers Shirt - $18.99

I might actually buy this. If there are any Hispanics reading this blog, please tell me if this is racist.

Joe Jonas Dodgers Ray Ban Wayfarers

WANT. WANT. WANT. WEENIS. WANT.

Big Victory in the Big Citi

I saw the 2009 Dodgers in person for the first time last night. Wow. This team is impressive. Never mind that we were facing Livan "my belly interferes with my throwing elbow" Hernandez. Never mind that the squad was going up against a disastrously depleted Mets squad (The Post has resorted to calling the team "the Replace-Mets" lately). Never mind that Randy Wolf had supersticiously changed his uniform number hours before the game. The Dodgers looked incredible.

This is the most stacked Dodgers offense I have ever witnessed in my life.

I walked through the Citi gates and up the Keith Hernandez Jackie Robinson Rotunda stairs at 7:25, fifteen minutes after the first pitch. Glancing at the massive scoreboard on the way to our cheap seats way up and behind home plate, I discovered we were already up 4-0. My buddy Scott said that's the thing about baseball. In no other sport can a game be over in such short order. I responded with something about him spending less time pouring Jim Beam in the Grand Central men's room.

The game almost became a game in the bottom of the first, but the Mets limp lineup couldn't muster more than a run. They got another in the bottom of the third, but by that time we had tagged Livan for 6 and it really did look like the game was over.

Citi was about half full by the top of the sixth, either because Mets fans had left the building or because they were wandering around - which the stadium's design seems to encourage you to do. And that's really the best part about this new stadium. Designed by HOK Sport (the builders behind 16 other MLB stadiums - think Citizen's Bank Park, Petco, Comerica), Citi features more standing room than any stadium I've been to. There are cup holders behind seats in the last row of certain sections. The ushers let you hover anywhere you're not obstructing a view. And there are picnic tables above the bullpens in center field (more impressive: there was room to sit down).

The food's not too bad either. Of course we didn't wait 30 minutes for Shake Shack, but the Skipper and Jonny ate some carnitas tacos that they called "decent." Pete had a bag of peanuts I couldn't stop putting my hands in, and I spent no time waiting in line for a mediocre dog and a couple beers - both of which were better and cheaper than their new Yankee stadium counterparts. I'm quite convinced now that Citi tramples Yankee Stadium in every other facet, too. Dodger Stadium? Not quite. The new Mets stadium, though offering a backdrop slightly more scenic than Shea, still overlooks what looks like a vast industrial wasteland. When I think of Dodger Stadium, I Think Blue.

greetings from the mac store in soho. i'm waiting for a burrito from calexico, one of the only nyc burritos i'll eat, and trying out this 15 inch macbook pro. i want it. about as badly as i want o-hud and rafi to be the first team tandem with 50 steals each in a season. yesterdays dodger loss was a bummer, a typical late inning implosion that we're sure to see plenty more of in the months to come. 88-74 is a fair prediction, brother. but damn it'd be nice to get 90-95 wins and make the div championship a sure thing. too much to ask? not with our payroll, not with our lineup, not with the quality hurlers that are sure to be sold for minor league marbles once the trade deadline looms. toronto can't afford to keep halladay. can it? he looks good in blue. lets take him, at least for a third of a season.

i'm already looking a few months into the future, because this division is ours. the tigers never had the division in the first place before or after acquiring miggy cabs and their payroll never seemed sustainable. we've got that mix of youth, wisdom and unbridled talent that won the red sox those world series the past few years. with all our incestuous give and take with the red sox we always joked that we wanted to be them. maybe this is the year it's for real.

My Favorite Picture

The good ol' days....


I love the Giant Tomato and his badonkadonk